So, I set up this blog pretty much just so I'd have something to tell things to.
I'm not bothered who reads it, if anyone does really. Nor do I in all honesty care what anyone who reads it thinks of me. Call me what you like, say what you like, advise if you must. But chances are I'll ignore you.
So I'm Ashley, I'm 17. Sixth Year at High School. I've had some shit in my life, not things I really want to go into. But things turned around when I was 14. Met a fantastic guy, my soulmate so it turned out. Y'know the rest of the story, girl meets boy, girl falls in love, girl gets guy, girl and guy are fantastically happy and dream of and talk about forevers. They break up.
Over two and a half of the best years of my life.
After that I went out with this other guy David. I didn't even really like him. Just kinda . . . needed someone to want me. I ended up breaking up with him after a month.
Now I'm with this guy called Pete, who yes I do love. He's wonderful. Thing is being the retard I am I thought hey I know, I'll say YES when he asked me to marry him. Now I have his dead mother's wedding ring on my finger and I feel like shit. 'Cause thing is, I'm still in love with the first guy, Kieran. Madly, truly, deeply, completely head over heels. But he broke my heart and told me he didn't love me anymore. Now he doesn't know.
What on EARTH do I do eh? I don't even know HOW I get myself in these messes. I can't just be happy that I have a wonderful guy who wants to spend his life with me, I have to to pine after someone who's confused about what they want. And if I broke up with Pete, I think I'd actually kill him. He talks about how he literally couldn't be without me, that SCARES me.
Bleh. Anyhoo I just thought I'd have a wee teeny bit of a rant. Might blog more after I think of something to DO about all this crap.
Toodles
xxxxx
